A Fruit Walks Into A Farmers’ Market

Saying you’re “not a huge fan of the farmers’ market” in San Francisco is like saying, “Yeah, I think Lindsay Lohan’s a good role model” or “What’s wrong with the Westboro baptist church?” And yet, when this fruit went to check it out for the first time, he felt like he didn’t really fit in. Here’s my inner monologue as I peruse the farmers’ market, new on Thought Catalog.

I Didn’t Think About You Once Today

After a breakup, everyone goes through certain rituals in an attempt to get over their former lover. Photos are burned, love letters are shredded, articles of their clothing that once acted like a security blanket are tossed in the dumpster. Once that’s all done, the heart-broken can proudly announce, “I’m over them!” But we all know they’re lying. The day you’re truly over someone is not the day you set their old mixed CDs on fire, it’s the day you stop thinking about them altogether. My new article on Thought Catalog is a description of what that day might be like.

7 Songs To Omit From Your Sex Playlist

It’s Murphy’s Law of Music – if you put your iPod on shuffle and another person is listening, you will undoubtedly subject them to the most embarrassing tunes your music library has to offer. This rule of bad luck seems to go double if you and this other person are naked, which is why creating “sex playlists” has become a popular practice. As this new article on Thought Catalog warns though, don’t let any of these songs accidentally slip onto the list!

What Food Teaches Us About Life

So I was at the gym watching the food network (don’t even get me started on this wide-spread, yet brutal practice by gyms – exercising sucks, you’re really going to force me to watch Cupcake Wars while I do it?) when I realized that food can teach us a lot about life (it’s clear I was super hungry, right?) Here is everything I think we can learn from our food, new on Thought Catalog.